A child's future
starts with you

If your child has a plan of adoption, or has already been adopted, you may be feeling many different things. Some parents and relatives describe feeling grief, sadness, anger, worry, confusion or loss. Others are unsure what support is available or what will happen next. Adopt Thames Valley’s Birth Relative Support Service is here to offer a safe, respectful and understanding space where you can talk, ask questions and be supported at your own pace.

Who the service is for

This service is for birth parents and other birth relatives who would like support when a child has a plan of adoption or after an Adoption Order has been made. You do not have to manage these feelings or questions on your own. Support is voluntary, which means we will only contact you and work with you if you agree to this.

What we can offer

Every family’s situation is different. We will listen to what matters to you and help you understand what support may be available. This could include:

• time to talk about how you are feeling and what adoption may mean for you, your child and your family;

• help to understand the adoption process, including what may happen before and after an Adoption Order;

• support to prepare for meetings with adopters or prospective adopters, where these are agreed;

• support before and after direct keeping in touch arrangements, including time to talk things through afterwards;

• help with letterbox contact, including thinking about what to write and understanding how exchanges work;

• support to think through practical arrangements for keeping in touch, such as travel or planning ahead;

• information about birth parent support groups or other services that may be helpful.

Keeping the child at the centre

We know how important children’s connections with their birth family can be. Our support helps everyone keep the child’s needs at the centre, while also recognising that this can be emotional for birth parents and relatives. Where keeping in touch arrangements are agreed, we can help you think about what may feel safe, meaningful and helpful for the child, and how adults can work together in a positive way.

How to access support

If you would like to find out more, you can speak to a professional who is already supporting you, or you can contact us directly to ask what help may be available. We will explain things clearly and answer your questions. Referrals can only be accepted where the birth relative has given informed consent.

Email: ATV.PermanenceSupport@Oxfordshire.gov.uk
Phone: 01865 323121